|“If you have come to these pages for laughter, may you find it. If you are here to be offended, may your ire rise and your blood boil. If you seek an adventure, may this song sing you away to blissful escape. If you need to test or confirm your beliefs, may you reach comfortable conclusions. All books reveal perfection, by what they are or what they are not. May you find that which you seek, in these pages or outside them. May you find perfection, and know it by name.”
--Christopher Moore; Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
My dad just yelled “I SWEAR I’LL CUT OFF WHAT’S LEFT OF YOUR DICK IF YOU FUCKING TOUCH MY COKE DON’T YOU DARE” and I came in the...
To the person who leaked the photos:
I really can’t wait for winter because then I can start wearing the other 97% of my clothes.
Oh my GOD
My grandma bought my grandpa new pants and my mom asked him how they felt and he goes “like a...
in grade 11 i was on the phone w this boy i wanted and i owed him a favour or something so i was like “it can be anything you...